I was just reading a post from Jon Acuff who his helping to launch an initiative for women coming out of prostitution. I first thought to myself, it is cool that because of his notoriaty that he is able to help bring awareness on such a grand scale.
That made me think of how my everyday, ordinary life is not for naught. I can make a difference everyday in the space that is around me.
I do not ever want to rest on my laurels of believing that because I reached out once in life (or maybe 50 times) that I am done; however, I want to share a story to hopefully inspire you - and remind myself.
In May a woman came to church with a little girl. She looked like an ordinary, everyday woman living her life. When I introduced myself to her I did not expect my life to be altered. We had a bit of small talk to begin with. When we realized we had lived in the same state and in my little, itty bitty hometown of 1800 people resides one of her best friends, she began to open up.
"Marie" has 2 boys she has not seen in years and a 6 year old little girl she hasn't seen in 6 months. Her husband left her last year with her girl. She stopped using Meth in January and alcohol is her drug of choice at this point. Marie is a stripper by trade as her felony history makes getting a "real" job almost impossible. Marie wants to change her life but her history keeps her returning to what she knows.
With a houseful of 12 people (who were all at church too), I invited Marie to lunch, with just me. Ray took care of all of our company.
At lunch, accompanied by the adorable 7 year daughter "Megan" of a man Marie is residing with, I heard stories of hope and hopelessness.
Marie's husband was the owner of a club she worked in previously. He was "proud" of her for getting back to work and earning her own way. This pride was devastating to Marie. She wanted to know what man actually takes pride in a woman sharing her body with the world. Marie said no woman she knows can go into these situations without an intoxicated brain - "no woman wants a man to look at her that way. We all have to have an altered brain or there is no way we can do this work."
Marie and I did not talk in too much detail because of Megan's presence. Megan left the table here and there when Marie would open up more.
I offered to have some conversations on Marie's behalf and gave her my information as she had no phone or address to offer. She was going to be displaced of a home within the next two weeks. I encouraged her to take a few action steps and promised information upon her return to church the following week.
Before we left one another I told her I would really like to understand the tears and sorrow in her eyes. She asked why I care. I told her that I have a 13 year old son that I would love to protect from the pain of pornography but feel a bit hopeless as it seems like an impossible snare. I told her that from her tears I know there is pain and to understand that pain helps me to understand more about why this snare is so terrible.
Marie told me, "I have two sons. I have a daughter. I have read the Bible. I know my life is wrong. I know I destroy marriages. I know Jezabbel from the Bible and I am her." She went on to tell me that one night when she was at work, she went out for a break. "Across the street was a field of horses. They were all dark. They were dead - not dead as in death - but had no life, you know? There eyes were hollow, they had no fat on their bodies, they were skeletons. But then, a white horse, full of life came up in the midst. God showed me that the white horse was me - the white horse was full of life in the midst of death. He told me that I was choosing to live amongst the dead and it was time for me to move through death and into life."
We said our good-byes and looked forward to meeting the next week.
The next week came and Marie DID show up. She had moved to another strangers home during the week and got a cell phone. We exchanged information and prayed - we prayed for a long time with lots of tears and time.
Marie told me that some Christians won't speak to her and others just tell her they love her no matter what. "They don't encourage me to change - they just 'love' me." She told me that she doesn't think either Christian is right. "What I do is not ok - it's not ok with me and it's not ok with God."
I looked at Marie in the eyes and with complete genuine love told her, "Marie, I love you. I don't love you because of what you do or don't do. I don't care if you are the CEO of a large company, a mom, a stripper, or a prostitute, I love you because you are a wonderful, beautifully made princess of the One true King - and that alone is enough of a reason to love you." I went on, "I don't want you to continue to hurt yourself. I don't want you to continue to live in this life that brings misery. I want you to choose a new life - a new life that brings the fullness of everything God desires for you. I want you to choose a new life - a new life that you can be proud of. I want you to choose a new life - a life free of addictions and pain." I further explained, "Marie, I want to walk through this with you - but if you come back next week and have continued to do that which you do not want, I will still love you. When I see you, I see a child of God - a woman of love - a woman of desire."
This is the last time that I have seen or talked to Marie.
Unfortunatley, our church closed it's doors two weeks later and she did not attend either of the following two weeks.
I don't know why God chose for our paths to cross for this short period of time.
I was just living my everyday ordinary life - God brought Marie into it - for a short period of time.
She hasn't returned any texts since two weeks after our last encounter.
Marie changed my life - she allowed me to see into the life of one who lives very differently than me. She allowed my family to see that God is everywhere - even in the strip clubs - even in places where others do not want him to be. I pray that my sons have been saved from a life of addiction.
My hope is that Marie knows she is loved by God but honestly, I hope she knows she is loved by me.
I will never stop praying for Marie.
...and Megan - the 7 year old little girl - I don't know much of her story. I know she does not have a mom and lives with secrets. I pray for her safety. I pray for her to be loved and loved well. I pray that the God of this universe would protect her and make himself known to her.
May we all live our everyday, ordinary lives for the One we call Father, King, Savior, Counselor!
Romans 12:1-2 - MSG
So
here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday,
ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around
life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for
you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted
to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead,
fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out.
Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it.
Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of
immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed
maturity in you.
